


Kageyama's First Time (Benadryl)

by athabascablood



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Multi, Other, Post-Episode: s08e20 Pac-Man Fever
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-10
Updated: 2016-08-12
Packaged: 2018-08-07 23:58:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7734868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/athabascablood/pseuds/athabascablood
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(DO NOT)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Team Karasuno (Hinata, Kageyama, Tobio, Suga, Big man (Daichi) Tanaka Nishinoya Tsukinikna Little one) were devastated by the death of GREAT RULER Ghenghis Kong

Mongol leader Genghis Khan (1162-1227) rose from humble beginnings to establish the largest land empire in history. After uniting the nomadic tribes of the Mongolian plateau, he conquered huge chunks of central Asia and China.

But no one took it harder than Tobio Kageyama himself. Why, you ask? 

Kageyama and Mongol leader Genghis Khan had chemistry. And NOT the kind of chemistry you mix bottles in class.

No, their chemistry was unmatched by Romio and Juliet 

And so Kageyama set out for his next love. 

After Basketbal practise he held the door open for Hinata articulately, spark catching their eyes when they connected gazes. His optic nerve tickled.

"Y'all'dve hold the door open for me?"

"Yes"

Kageyama's heart began to pound. He returned home that night, knowing just what he had to do next


	2. Mourning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I want to know the truth instead of wondering why, I want to know the answers, no more lies, I want to shut the door and open up my mind

golovokrudzenie (goh-loh-voh-kroo-dzyeh-nee-eh)  
Yeva Adam (yeh-vah ah-dam)  
muchenie (moo-chyeh-nee-eh)  
dzertva (dzyehrt-vah)  
apostol (a-poh-stohl)  
bog bol (bohg bohl)  
roditsya (roh-dee-tsyah)  
probovat (proh-boh-vyah-ts)  
krov (kroh-v)  
noll (nohll)

Kageyama concluded his routine.

Would Hinata like it?

"HINATA YOUR STICKS"

[Author's notes;  
Thanks for the support guys  
Next chapter Friday]


	3. [BROTH ROCKS?]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which HInata discovers his estranged father

"Open sesame, HInata-chan." (The soup has already gone cold in the white bowl)

Finally, his time had come. He and HInata were now in bed together. Things were becoming steamy, and they were steaming up fast. Only this was different than the kitchen. In the bedroom there was no off switch and there was no mother to yell at you for cooking your food on maximum temperature.

Up and down, side to side, left and right, east and west. There was no (MATING) position left un-tried. 

Wholesomely satisfied, they returned home, but the jar inevitably began to fill itself all over again.

~2 days later~

"Hi boys time for practice?"

"No HINATA"

"What why?"

"Look"

"Who is that man"

The man took one step forward, his homogeneous eyebrows knitting together. 

"I ain't some fucking chump, HInata."

"What"

"Let me tell you - I aint some fucking chump. Don't talk to me like I'm some kind of fucking chump, alright? Because im not. I'm a business man, a family man, a man of the people, a man of the church, a man of the country. A man of god, A missionary. A post-man. I work at jamba juice, okay? My dog is spayed. I've got letters ready for me at the notary republic. I make my own quilts. Love eggs. I shop locally, I support local causes. I take cruise ships every three months. I wear reading glasses. My daughter has braces. My eyebrows are shaved. My friends are all geese. I live in a house with no windows. My clothes are all combustible. My medicine is OTC except for one prescription. I am inside of the matrix, there's a shark in my bathroom, my dog sleeps in my bed with me, my friends are all dead. I went to India once. I like bowling. So don't talk to me like I'm some kind of fucking chump alright? because I'm not."

To be continued

[Author's note;  
Thanks guys. Tune in next time for more]


End file.
